Thursday, September 10, 2009

My History

I have been told that I tend to be overly verbose, so I'll try to make this as concise as I can.

I am a left-handed male, first born ENTJ Virgo, born in the year of the Monkey.  I was born on a Saturday, which means I am a Saturday's child who will work hard for a living.  Chemistry.com says I am a director-explorer.  I come from mostly German/Polish peasant stock, which I suppose means one half of me wants to invade the other half.  Besides the German-Polish I am also part English and Irish and one-fourth who knows, so I am pretty much a Northern European mongrel.  National Geographic tells me my people emigrated from Africa up through the Middle East into central Asia, then over to Europe.  I used to think we came through the Middle East straight to Europe, but it turns out I was wrong. 

I think these words form a very good, concise description of me.  What do they mean?  Hey, I'm not going to do all your work for you!  You are on the net - the best research tool in the history of the world - go find out for yourself!  If you can't bother to do that then I suppose you'll have to read all my verbose words to come.

I have played (American tackle) football, which I loved dearly, and I currently put the shot and throw the discus and javelin.  This fits my broad shoulders, relatively short legs, and fast-twitch muscles.  No, I'm not a dwarf!  I'm a 6'1" mesomorph who struggles with keeping my body fat down to a healthy level.

If IQ measurements matter for you, mine is high, but I have found that intelligence is mostly a curse instead of a blessing.  I have passed this curse down to my children.  I'm sorry for that.  I am happily, faithfully married for over 26 years to a wonderful woman who shares few of my traits and yet is strong enough, and patient enough, to put up with my quirks.  Because of her I have a beautiful house and we have four great children, spanning the ages from twelve to twenty two.  We have done our best to help them get started in life, despite the curse of intelligence that we seem to have given them.

I was somewhat of a child prodigy, but not in the overt bad way, like being pushed into things before I was ready, but in the covert bad way, meaning I was seen to have had 'potential' and I have spent much of my life trying to reach my potential.  People expected great things from me, and I expected great things from me too.

So what have I done, actually?  I did the college thing, then I did the corporate thing, and I stuck with the corporate thing, and I stayed with the corporate thing to pay the bills , and I learned much about the corporate thing that I didn't like but stuck it out, and finally the corporate thing threw me out.  I suppose I am proud that I avoided my layoff as long as I did, and I stuck with an incredibly bad situation right through to the end.  Yeah, that wasn't easy to do, and I had bills to pay, a lot of bills, what with supporting five other people and four college educations, and I had promises to keep and miles to go before my sleep.

So much of the bills are paid, but many are not yet paid, and I have been cast out by corporate America, cast out by IBM, who said "you'll start slow, with low pay and few benefits, but if you stick with us, trust us, in the long run it will be worth it, with a pension and prestige and at the end you'll be able to do all those things you ever wanted us to do."  Yes, I traded my potential fortune for security, and in the end I am left with no fortune and no security.  IBM changed the rules in the middle of the game, and they are not even decent enough to admit they did it.

But I do not want to get into that here.  Maybe later, in the greater context of my views on the world at large and how things are.  Despite what has happened to me I am still better off than many many people, and I am blessed with many fortunate things, and bitterness and anger, while very real emotions, will not serve me well in the future.  I will simply say that corporations are, by design, immoral and non-sensible creations that can take on a life of their own, a life which has tremendous power but which lacks all the good attributes that humanity is capable of having.

And look at that, I was not concise at all.  Yeah, I can certainly ramble on about things.  If you have suffered this far then I give credit to you, my dear reader, and I am afraid all I can promise is more such suffering from my verbiage in the future.

20 comments:

  1. Great start to the blog, Tripp! Very entertaining, and I look forward to reading more. I followed your reference from Kevin Drum's blog. Please leave a reference there every now and again...

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  2. Interestingly, I am a female, left-handed, first-born Virgo. I see problems for the two of us (grin). I also share your unfortunate experience with IBM through my husband's 23 year tenure there, now ended. Have fun with your blog! I'll be back ...

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  3. Thanks both of you.

    And with all due respect for the good, right-handed people out there - left-handers are the next stage in human evolution. Sorry if you didn't know that. By all means don't take my word on it. Check it out on your own.

    We are probably the *last* natural step in human evolution, at least we are if biotech comes through on some of its promises.

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  4. Tripp,

    I've read quite a bit about left-handedness but have forgotten most of it. Nothing like getting older! I do remember rather clearly, though, a book I read that humorously described how society conspires against left-handers. For example, the way our road system is set up leads to more highway deaths for left-handers. The instinctive response for a left-hander to avoid a collision is to turn left. Unfortunately, that's where the oncoming traffic is! More left-handers die from accidents of all sorts which leads to a higher mortality rate for lefties. Lots of funny and less tragic examples are found in the book concerning appliances, tools, etc. I'll see if I can find it and let you know what the title is. Perhaps you've read it.

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  5. nepata,

    I'd appreciate the link. I've actually read a fair amount about left-handedness, and when I say we are the next step in human evolution I know that no reputable scientist would go so far as to say that at this time.

    Still, I think because of the bad way lefties were treated we've shyed away from the topic.

    Neuro-science has focused on righties, because they are more prevalent.

    Try this little experiment - lefties are about 10% of the US population at this time. When you watch a TV show or movie take note when the character either writes something or throws something. Much more that 10% of the time the actor is left-handed. In general lefties are way over-represented in the arts. I suspect in other things, too.

    As for the driving - in the UK it is the opposite, so it would be interesting to see what the accident statistics are there. They probably don't keep track of handedness.

    I've heard the reason US roads are different from UK roads is because in the UK their roads began with single riders on horseback passing right hand to right hand, and in the US our roads started more for horsedrawn trucks with teams of horses and the 'driver' would sit on the left side to better use his whip with his right hand.

    But who knows for sure?

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  6. Tripp,

    Thanks for getting me to browse through the book again. Quite a few laughs for me! I have the edition which is a collection of four of his (James de Kay) books: The Left-Handed Book (1966); The Natural Superiority of the Left-Hander (1979); The World's Greatest Left-Handers (1985); and Left-Handed Kids (1989).
    I'd love to just start sharing with you all the funny facts included in the book but I'll limit myself to just one in the political vein.

    Gerald Ford was a leftie who only wrote with his left hand when he was sitting down. If he were standing at a blackboard he would use his right hand. Isn't that weird???? In the drawing of Ford in the book he is writing "I will not pardon another president. I will not pardon another president." So humor is a constant in the book.

    To respond to your comment about lefties in the arts, I studied classical piano from the age of 5 to 25. The book has a long list of artists who are lefties. I went to grad school at Indiana University and after our conversation, wish I would have taken some sort of informal poll, at least of my many talented friends there. Do you have any artistic inclinations? Of course you do.

    Here's a link to the book at Amazon:

    http://www.amazon.com/Left-handers-Handbook-Left-handed-Superiority-Left-hander/dp/B0012M308E/ref=sr_1_17?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1252701836&sr=1-17

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  7. nepata,

    I'm nearly done with a little art project I've been using to fill my spare time. I might post a pic when it is done. I play French horn fairly well, although my chops are shot now. I love acting and theatre. I've performed in a number of musicals, and playing Officer Lockstock in Urinetown has been my favorite role so far.

    I'm a better actor than an singer, but I can get by. Art has been my passion while technical stuff pays the bills.

    My wife is also left-handed, and was a theater major who has done a lot of acting and directing. The books said our kids had a 50% chance to be a lefty but sadly only one of them got the advantage. He acts and writes incredibly well.

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  8. Wonderful! I hope you do post a pic of your 'little art project.' Now you've got me curious. I've never done much theater, even though Virgos and lefties are supposed to excel at acting. My daughter (a non-lefty) was an art major in college so I'm connected to the visual arts through her. For some reason, though, I don't consider myself very talented at 'visual' things. I prefer a written explanation over a diagram, for example. Yes, I understand bringing home the bacon by doing something other than art. I fear for my daughter's ability to make a living. She's doing real estate photography at the moment and considers that selling out. Oh, well. What can you do?
    I'm certainly familiar with that road. Although it can be a painful one, it's usally pretty interesting.

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  9. nepata,

    Unfortunately these days all of us are 'sell-outs' to some degree. With my first born I had a real sense of guilt asking her to face up to that, when she was considering her college options. I mostly got over it by realizing it wasn't *my* fault the world is the way it is, and the corporate world requires that we all must be sell-outs, or 'prostitutes' to put it crudely.

    I signed on with IBM immediately out of college, I mean like the next week. I was 21. I signed an employment contract that stated that IBM owned ALL the intellectual property I created while employed there. This included programs, of course, but also songs, art work, games, ideas, everything I created! I found out most of the details later when I tried to create some of that stuff.

    Performing arts was one area they couldn't claim. When PCs were just starting I loved the games and wrote a few, but IBM said that not only was I forbidden to sell those games, I was also forbidden to give them away, because they were IBM property, even though I wrote them on my own time and with my own equipment, and even though IBM was not in the game business. The same went for all other artwork.

    Details like that are just one of the reasons I have such a complex view of corporations, and one of the reasons I have trouble explaining how it used to be and the bargains I made at the time and how shafted I felt when IBM reneged on their half of the bargain.

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  10. Tripp, I don't even know what to say about IBM except that I despise it and corporations like it. Anyway, you're well aware of all the changes over the years. My husband started working there in 1981, back in the good old days when IBMers were given quite a few perks. This may be around the time you started? All I can say is that the resource action was extremely painful for him, shaking his self-confidence, self-image, etc. His colleagues were wonderful in their support at the time though. I doubt that he'll work anywhere again (since we don't want to move) so money becomes an issue. We have always lived like grad students (gr), so have quite a lot of money saved, but will it be enough to see us through another possible 30 years? Who knows, but also who cares? I'm to the point of getting very tired of the game. I'm not expressing myself well. Hope you get an idea of my disillusionment.

    Just one more quick story: My father owned a small family business - ice cream! - and in the 60s, early 70s, the competition from the big national companies became too much. No profit at all. But my dad kept the business running at his own personal loss for another 5 years just so his five employees would make it to SS age.

    My point is that business can be 'moral' and 'fair.' It's not an impossibility. TJ Watson, who founded the IBM Research Center here in NY, is probably rolling over in his grave. He was another person who valued employees over the bottom line, keeping everyone working on shifts during the Depression.

    Sheesh, what a disjointed comment. Sorry.

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  11. nepata,

    Don't apologize about being disjointed! My goodness, this blog is disjointed, with the only thread tying it together being my life and my interests.

    I must make a small disagreement - corporations are never 'good' or 'moral.' Those are human qualities, and for sure individual businessman and businesswoman may be good and moral. Frequently, though, people working for corporations, especially the executives, compromise their morals when acting for the corporation. Either that or the real bastards, those without morals, rise to the top. Either way, corporations seem to bring out the worst in human moral behavior.

    Like you, IBM is very personal to me, because I'm a second generation IBMer, meaning my father worked there from about 1960 to 1993 or so. I grew up hearing how wonderful IBM was, and I got my first taste of computers through my Dad, and I was hooked.

    Like many corporations, including Wal-Mart, IBM went through a great shift when their founder died. I am skeptical about some of what is written about TJ Watson, because obviously the winners get to right the history. He was rabidly anti-union, but he was also rabidly pro-worker. He fought unionization by treating his employees so well they had no need for a union. I started IBM in 1978, and things hadn't changed so much yet. IBM was still, maybe unfairly, a monopoly in the computer business and even without TJ IBM had the luxury of being on top and were able to treat its employees very well. Sure, maybe it was like a cult, a little, but it went both ways. IBM got loyalty and hard work and the employees got loyalty and good pay and recognition.

    You are correct that during the last depression IBM refused to lay off workers, and instead stock-piled supplies, which meant when SS came into being IBM already had the equipment ready to tabulate and manage the data.

    But TJ Watson is gone and the IBM Culture is gone and the world is a poorer place because of it.

    I am so sorry about your husband. He must not be that old, and I still have a lot of hope that competent, smart people with the right work attitude in America will find a place to be useful again.

    Clearly the old ways are gone, but the future remains, and as an ENTJ I'm doing my best to be part of the future. I feel like a grad student myself - seeing the world as wide open and trying to see where I can fit in.

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  12. Good for you, Tripp. Your optimism and forward-looking thinking will see you through. My husband is 56, rather an awkward age to be looking for a job, particularly after being resource actioned. He has a BA from Standford in math, a Ph.D. from Carnegie Mellon in computer science. Not many companies want to hire such a person at a high salary grade when they can get a good person right out of grad school on the cheap. He interviewed at Google with no luck. It's about the only place around here that does research. Research at IBM has changed drastically from the early days when it was pure research in a variety of areas. Now it's very much applied development work. Nothing wrong with that, but it's not quite the ivory tower it used to be. Lots of people in research now are looking to get out because of the work environment. One of the people John interveiwed with at Google was a 60-ish man who used to be the head of Bell Labs (!). At Google he has a rather lowly position considering his past experience. So they had a commiseration fest. Just as well that John didn't get the job. It would have been a two+ hour commute each way. Ugh.

    Were you on the old pension plan? The scuttlebut seems to be that IBM is trying to get rid of those people. But you know that too.
    And yes, it's way past time for a union for IT workers.

    It's so interesting that your dad worked for IBM. It certainly makes it all the sadder that you got screwed. Damn IBM.

    I was going to ask you what ENTJ means but I found out by googling, read the description of an ENTJ and took the test myself. I turned out to be an INFJ, more 'Virgo-ish' than you. (gr). Here's the description:

    INFJ: "Author". Strong drive and enjoyment to help others. Complex personality. 1% of the total population. These are serious students and workers who really want to contribute. They are private and easily hurt. They make good spouses, but tend to be physically reserved. People often think they are psychic. They make good therapists, general practitioners, ministers, and so on.

    So there you go. Pretty accurate I think, although some of the questions were difficult for me to answer. I would have liked to choose both answers sometimes.

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  13. PS: John took the test too and turned out the same as me, an INFJ. We both disagree on one descriptor which says we tend to take the values of those around us as our own. I do try to "walk in others' shoes" and understand others' values given their experiences but am quite stubborn in not adopting values that aren't my own.

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  14. nepata,

    I'm about the youngest person at IBM to have the 'traditional' pension. IBM tried to take my pension away by "converting" it to a 401K of about 66% of the value. I joined an underground group fighting the 'conversion,' and about a month later IBM relented for those of us over 40 years old, and I was barely over 40 years old, so I qualified for a choice. Thank Goodness for civil rights. Forty is the age when one can claim age discrimination. Because I was over 40 and because IBM feared an age discrimination lawsuit I had a choice - old pension plan or new, and I chose the old. I suspect most people with a choice would choose the old plan. That is when I started to get interested in politics, economics, corporations, and civil rights. Getting screwed out of one's life savings tends to focus one's mind.

    I took Myers-Briggs as part of a team leader workshop at IBM. I'm not sure how complete the online version is. I think there were more questions in the version I took, and there were also questions that were not true/false yes/no. I think I'd take the online version with a grain of salt, but I found the version that I took to be very helpful.

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  15. Tripp,

    Actually, I think the online test came up with a pretty good description of me and my husband. Of the 16 types, this is where I would place myself. I DO know myself pretty well after 62 years. (gr) And yes, I did 'rob the cradle' by marrying my 6-year younger husband.

    I'm well aware of the old pension/new 401K rip-off. John also kept the old pension. Who wouldn't??? Unfortunately, he was resourced out 1-1/2 years before a bridge to retirement would have been kicked in at 25 years. Actually the only extra at that point is health insurance, which of course we didn't get. The money he had in the pension plan was ours and we chose the annuity option, but had he worked for another ten years the amount we have to play with would be much larger. My only solace is that I know for sure that IBM has lost a really smart, really creative, really helpful employee. When he was resourced actioned he received letters from a few of his co-workers who said he was the 'nicest' person in their group, willing to share info and help with ideas and problems others were having. Strangely these days, maybe because of the fear of losing their jobs, many in research have become extremely competitive, becoming secretive and possessive about their work. It's really not a good place to be. I'm feeling very happy at the moment being disassociated from IBM. Actually I think that feeling will last.

    What's up with the age discrimination law suit these days, do you know? We didn't join the class action suit, assuming it didn't have much of a chance of being won.

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  16. PS: I made a mistake. I forgot that the old pension plan was frozen 2 years ago, so I guess we didn't lose much in relation to that.

    Also, I'd better quit hogging your comment section! No one will comment if they have to
    barge in on an ongoing conversation. I'll be checking back now and again to catch your next blog or perhaps a look at that artwork of yours. Meanwhile I'll read your comments at Kevin's site with interest...

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  17. nepata,

    Don't worry, you are always welcome here. I didn't take part in the age discrimination suit, because I had a choice and took the old pension.

    I would have only sued for my pension, and I got it, although they froze mine at 29.5 years, not the full 30 years, but that was okay.

    I know what you mean about the 'jerks' being left at IBM. I know for a fact we oldsters had a 'bad' attitude - we were willing to help others and share or give away the credit. Having the jerks who are left will hurt IBM, but the thing is IBM doesn't really care, because they are dumping their US employees, except for sales and VPs (did you know there are 500 VPs?!). They care about India, not the US.

    I did post my art project. I posted it from Flickr, so I hope it made it okay.

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  18. Tripp,

    Your photos on Flicker are beautiful! You're a naturalist! Another similarity between us, except my knowledge is more about plants than about birds and insects, although I love birds and have a zillion feeders in the winter. As for insects, I can't kill them and in the summer am constantly rescuing dragonflies from our skylights. Most of the dragonflies know the routine by now. Large mop approaches, jump on it and a short ride to freedom. I'm afraid I'm not so kind with the insects that eat my plants, aphids, Japanese beetles, etc. But I do know my beneficial insects and avoid killing them.

    I couldn't find your artwork. There couldn't be TWO Tripp Davenports on Flickr, could there?

    My daughter published an online book of my garden for my birthday present. If you want to take a look at the first 15 pages, go here:

    http://www.blurb.com/bookstore/detail/831136

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  19. Tripp,

    Take a look.

    Comment 09/19/09: IBM advises CIO's how to deal with Baby Boomers by 'investing in global resources in countries with lower average age........
    http://slashdot.org/

    "Robert X. Cringely offers his take on IBM's patent-pending way to suck knowledge
    out of experts and inject it into younger, stronger, cheaper employees, possibly even
    in other countries. IBM's 'Platform for Capturing Knowledge' relies on immersive
    3-D gaming environments to transfer expert knowledge held by employees 'aged 50
    and older' to 18-25 year-old trainees, even those who find manuals 'difficult to
    read and understand.' It jibes nicely with an IBM White Paper (PDF) that advises
    CIOs to deal with Baby Boomers by 'investing in global resources from geographies
    with a lower average age for IT workers, such as India or China.' While Cringely
    isn't surprised that Big Blue's anyone-can-manage-anything,
    anyone-should-be-able-to-perform-any-job culture would spawn such an
    'invention,' he can't help but wonder: When you get rid of the real experts,
    who is going to figure out the new stuff?" -Anon-

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  20. nepata,

    Yup. The IBM strategy is VERY clear. IBM doesn't even try too hard to hide it - they just refuse to talk about it. By the way, sadly I think the beautiful photos you saw on youtube were from another Tripp Davenport. My little art project is in a different post I made here. Look at the September entries.

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